Friday, April 18

Lies I have heard recently, with commentary.

“I love Mondays.” First of all, what person in their right mind would trust the guy who said that?

“If you’d done the right thing, you’d be feeling better about this.” If doing the right thing were comfortable, we’d do it more often.

“You like it! I knew you would.” Oooooh, dear.

“I’m fine.” HA.

“If they have to say to trust them, it is obvious that they are not worth trusting.” Pot calls the kettle black, most of the time, anyway. Begging for trust isn’t always something villains do.

“It’ll be alright in the end.” A nice thought . . . eschatologically speaking.

“No, no, no; you look great . . . nobody will notice.” The people you don’t want to notice usually do; it is people seeing what they want to see that covers your mistakes most of the time.

“Trust in your inner self.” I can’t remember where I heard this sentiment, but: how deep! What a deep, deep pile of £$&% that is.

I would like everyone to know that I am not fooled, that I have had four hours of sleep out of the last 48, and that I did something very uncharacteristic today by getting a manicure. I am now going to think about getting out of my chair and into a bubble bath but it will take awhile until the caffeine has set in before I will be able to lift my elbows from the table. Tomorrow I am going to conjure up some molasses cookies and work on curriculum planning. Joy.


Beth said...

One of my favorites: "The more you spend, the more you save!" Um, no. Any second-grader can tell you that's not the way money works.

Get some sleep and enjoy your cookies!

miss rika said...

I was never a good coupon-cutter, for that very reason! I love living in Italy because our local vegetable stand does not deal with devilish slips of paper and advertising. If he wants you to buy something, he'll cut a slice off of it and convince you to taste it (the convincing bit is rather a show) . . .

The cookies are marvelous, by the by--they're from my favourite baking book; I think it is from King Arthur. have you used their stuff and what do you think of it?

Oh, and I tried that whole-wheat pastry recipe: it was a very crumbly disaster as a pastry dough, but I was the only one dissatisfied with it since there weren't any leftovers.