Tuesday, February 19

Rich and orphaned and beloved.

The only time I’ve ever felt like this I was also feeling poor and powerless and lonely, so it was all very confusing and I’m not sure what it all meant. I tried to write a poem like this one--in form rather than content--but it sounded sallow and surreal: it sounded hinged. The fact that love hopes at all times and also trusts at all times is a difficult thing to understand for those of us who stand with the light behind us.

Anyway, that’s why I love to read stories with happy endings.

4 comments:

Bob said...

May I ask what you mean by "those of us who stand with the light behind us"? I've never heard that phrase before.

miss rika said...

I'm being pretentious with my phrasing, really.

I mean that I find hope and trust difficult to understand in my heart and that I want them very badly but can never seem to grasp them fully. It is an obscure reference to Tolkien's recurring dream and to Plato's allegory of the cave that I take pleasure in using because few people read this blog:)

I'm sorry I confused you, tho. And your icon is awesome.

Bob said...

I've been reading your blog for some time, and I enjoy it quite a bit.

I should have made the connection to Plato, I'm kicking myself for missing that. I know about Tolkien's recurring dream of the great wave, but I don't remember how the light fit into it all. Time to go read his biography and Letters again!

And thank you, I just cut and shrunk a picture of Vetinari I found on the web.

miss rika said...

Ah! I am pleased you enjoy my scribbling. Your idea of an OED blog is commendable. I was fortunate enough to have access to an abridged OED when I was doing my masters program and it was lovely to bring to parties.

Also please do not kick yourself. I did a bit of page-turning (very difficult, since it is an addictive habit) and found that I'm mistaking Eowyn's metaphor for Tolkien's dream: "I stand upon some dreadful brink, and it is utterly dark in the abyss before my feet, but whether there is any light behind me I cannot tell. For I cannot turn yet. I wait for some stroke of doom." That's from one of her conversations with Faramir when they are both in the Houses of Healing. Sorry about that.

I'm terribly illiterate when it comes to Pratchett but I've been meaning to go binging on Discworld for two years now. The time is coming.